exactly that

Posts tagged ‘rape culture’


Umm.  How do I say this…


Hell fucking no.

There is a whole lot I can say about porn right now, but there are a lot of people who would say it better than me.  I have nothing against porn where everyone is 2257 Compliant (and I mean everyone, even the anti-porn crowd blowhards who think they are making “fair and unbiased documentaries”) and completely willing, as in doing the work because they want to, and not because they have no other options.  There is a lot of nuance there that is ignored in my statement, like the lack of options to women that would lead them to make that choice…but that is not the conversation I am wanting to have here.  This is not a porn debate.

Instead, let’s talk about that phrase.

I have never been raped.  I shared one time at Cara’s place a story about being inappropriately touched by a family member once, something I have never really told anyone before, but I can not attest to the pain and trauma of being raped.  I can not personally imagine how horrifying that must be to endure and to heal from, if such a thing is ever truly possible.

But I can say that were I to ask someone I know who has been raped they would probably not say “It was an awful lot like voluntarily watching a sex video or looking at a nudie magazine”.  I intensely detest the flippant use of the word rape to describe anything that someone find arbitrarily unpleasant, like getting pwned in a video game or having to pay taxes.  It is already incredibly difficult to get many courts to take it seriously, or to even get news media to use the word appropriately, and the casual use of rape to describe an unpleasant experience doesn’t do anything to help the cause.

I would have to say that the only thing that can be compared to rape is…rape.


dear katherine heigl,


 i adore you.  i love your movies.  your Grey’s character is my favorite, and i totally agreed w/ you when you voiced your disapproval of what the writers are doing to her.  i jumped for joy w/ other like minded feminists when you spoke out about Knocked Up being a sexist movie, and supported you when you defended yourself for saying it.


seriously? we’re on this again?

h/t to feministing   
this is getting a little old, constantly having to repeat over and over again:  GREY RAPE DOES NOT EXIST!  


thursday blogwhoring…

filed under thursday blogwhoring, i bring you an excellent post, two actually, by jill over at feministe, where some really good discussion is going on regarding abortion.  as usual, jill has asked some really great questions, and you would think that logical discussion ensues, which it does mostly…


what i wanted to blog about thursday…

but i was angry…it happens…and i needed more time to learn about what had happened…south asia isn’t anything close to my AOE, i have more of an asia/pacific knowledge base to pull from.



h/t to the Red Queen

via Pandagon…yes, the article appalled me.  the act that it describes makes me want to cry and throw things…but it was the comments…the COMMENTS where the victim blaming shows up that makes me so fucking angry…the most offensive one IMNSHO was from the supposed officer…the vile and filth that spilled forth in his comment is a disgrace to the UCMJ, and the uniform that i have worn for four years…and i swear if i were to find out who that was i would find any reason under the UCMJ to make sure JAG went after him…oh…and just how many times do we have to see “woman” and “person” right there in pretty quotes, as if we, women are not somehow really people worthy of respect…

why don’t you over there in troll land play a nice game of hide and go fuck yourself…

told you so

it was only a matter of time b/f i found something that pissed me off so bad it made my stomach lurch…

run, do not walk, over to feministe and read jill’s post about this…and check out the fucks in comments who just can’t agree w/ putting more people in jail…those poor men who just shouldn’t be locked up b/c it won’t do them any good…

then, come back here, and tell me one good reason why i should not put my Kid in a bubble and never let her out…one reason for me to believe that is brigid forbid anything should happen to her that someone will believe her and do right by her…

and then, please, tell me we don’t live in a rape culture…

now if you will excuse me, i have to scotty about about some  transparent aluminum…

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