From Bill Wolfrum:
Many Christians have long believed that the Rapture would include the “vanishing” of millions of loyal Christians around the globe, leaving the rest of the world’s population to die in hellfire. The return of Jesus was supposed to usher in high times for loyal Christians as the doors of heaven would open for them.
As it turned out, however, Jesus showed no real interest in any Christian, living or dead, and instead only took three practicing Jains with him to play golf, and then the foursome ascended to the heavens.
“Maybe next time,” Christ was reported as saying. Christ shot a 73, sources say, as he struggled with his putting.
Go read the whole thing. Bill is, IMNSHO, the best thing in satire since Irish babies for dinner.