And, basically sometimes Jill just cracks my shit up.
But, seriously, I keep seeing all of this mud slinging among feminists, or refusals of conversation b/t feminists, all based on the “my feminism is better than your feminism” and “that makes you a bad feminist” argument. Seriously, people, knock it the fuck off. We have enough dividing us, stop pissing in your sandbox. Labels suck, especially when it prevents us from being productive. It feels as though too many of us are doing our damnedest to silence each other for not adhering to their labels. When we silence each other we lose. When we turn on ourselves the patriarchy/kyriarchy (thanks, whatshername!) wins.
For example, I see that whatshername from The Jaded Hippy tried to point out transphobia, and was silenced. I applaud her for not being silenced, and using her voice in her space to make more people aware that transphobia is not a part of feminism.
If you want to tell me that I am othering those who do not believe that being a trans* ally is part of feminism, fine. I respectfully disagree. Being a trans* ally is as essential a part of feminism/womanism to me as being a feminist/womanist is an essential part of being progressive. I am not willing to accept a version of feminism that does not acknowledge that their struggle is our struggle.
And I can’t put it better than this post by ‘Liss at Shakesville:
Realistically, the breadth of allies in a comprehensive challenge to the patriarchy is vast and varied. Though all of us, sans rigorous philosophical exertion, are hapless conduits for every limiting and oppressive archetype upon which the patriarchy depends, conveying the bars of our own cages, very few of us are its unconstrained beneficiaries. Even the average straight, white, middle class American man exchanges privilege for severe limitations on his personal expression and emotional life—and he is encouraged never to examine that devastating trade-off too closely, lest the veneer on the alleged bargain prove thin enough through which to see. We all serve the same callous master, and there’s little to celebrate in being the favored slave—especially compared to a life of freedom.
It is foolish to believe that there is more feminist, gender-queer cisgendered straight women, lesbians, gay men, bisexuals, and the Ts don’t all have in common culturally and politically than that which we do, given the particular restraints and prejudices of the patriarchal structure and its rigid notions of sex, gender, and sexuality conveyed in all its aspects. We struggle to achieve and/or maintain, to varying degrees, autonomy over our own bodies, and, crucially, freedom of choice with regard to what we want to do with those bodies. Life- and identity-changing events hang in the balance for us all—parenting, marriage, gender reassignment, being legally able to keep a job in spite of prejudice.
So, just stop it already. There is enough piss in my sandbox.