exactly that


tip of the hat:

rock the fuck on, California!

today, California became the second state in the US to allow same sex marriage!

In view of the substance and significance of the fundamental constitutional right to form a family relationship,” Chief Justice Ronald M. George wrote of marriage for the majority, “the California Constitution properly must be interpreted to guarantee this basic civil right to all Californians, whether gay or heterosexual, and to same-sex couples as well as to opposite-sex couples.”

California already has a strong domestic partnership law that gives gay and lesbian couples nearly all of the benefits and burdens of heterosexual marriage. The majority said that is not enough.

Given the historic, cultural, symbolic and constitutional significance of the concept of marriage, Chief Justice George wrote, the state cannot limit marriage to opposite-sex couples. The court left open the possibility that the Legislature could use another term to denote state-sanctioned unions so long as that term was used across the board for all couples.

(emphasis all fucking mine)

a standing O to Justice George, and the three other Justices who helped overturn the craptastic ban on same sex marriage for recognizing that forming a family union is a civil fucking right.


wag of the finger:

while my support is not a secret, i feel it only fair to give a great big “For Shame” to both Democratic candidates for not having the intestinal fortitude to stand up for same sex marriage.

Obama (via): 

Barack Obama has always believed that same-sex couples should enjoy equal rights under the law, and he will continue to fight for civil unions as President. He respects the decision of the California Supreme Court, and continues to believe that states should make their own decisions when it comes to the issue of marriage.

yes, well fuck you very much too.

Clinton (also via):

Hillary Clinton believes that gay and lesbian couples in committed relationships should have the same rights and responsibilities as all Americans and believes that civil unions are the best way to achieve this goal. As President, Hillary Clinton will work to ensure that same sex couples have access to these rights and responsibilities at the federal level. She has said and continues to believe that the issue of marriage should be left to the states.

What.  The.  Fuck.

hey, Dems, your fucking privilege is showing!

here’s the deal.  the right to marry whomever the hell you want is a heterosexual privilege, no matter what trolling douchebags will tell you (you know who i am fucking talking to).  i don’t fucking care that a good deal many of you out there believe that the concept of marriage is religious and why the hell would anyone want to be married anyway.  the truth is that along w/ all the rights and responsibilities associated w/ marriage there are great benefits and life problem fixers that are not available to my friends in the LGBTQ community.  many of you read my own musings on privilege where i discussed why i struggled w/ the decision to get married myself, after a long time of deciding that as an ally i would not do it until anyone who wanted to could do it.  but being that we are a military couple (myself formerly), and the Guy is up for orders soon, if we want to stay together then we best get our behinds a State Approved Piece of Paper Kissed By Jeebuz himself.  if he gets stationed overseas the only way to keep our family together is to marry.  my LGBTQ friends and family don’t have that option (i reserve the military issue for another rant on another day).  for them they would face painful separation.  green cards and health insurance are two other examples of problems that many couples face, but only hetero couples are offered a viable solution.

so, Dems, i hope you will forgive me when i say thanks a fucking lot for nothing on this.  if you want to reach out to the progressive vote i recommend rethinking your “let the States decide” bullshit argument.  it’s the same as fucking repro rights.  if you aren’t willing to belly up to the table and give citizens in this country federally protected rights then you are not worthy of my respect.

as usual, Melissa over at Shakesville has several incredible posts on why leaving these decisions to the states is a wanktacular idea (please note, it hurts hetero people too).


*Title shamelessly stolen from My Other Boyfriend.



Comments on: "tip of the hat/ wag of the finger*" (12)

  1. It’s about time and we can only hope that other states follow California’s example.

  2. Karebear said:

    so moving to california!! haha

  3. i am so all about that! i want to live in a place that recognizes that people have a right to love whoever the hell they want to .

    now that some states are making this law, i am hoping that “full faith and credit” is going to help smooth things over and move them along.

    but i am not holding my breath.

  4. hopelessthinker said:

    RIGHT ON! i was so cheering on the kitchen table this morning when i saw the news!!! ^_^ i’m so glad for those who wanted to push ahead this issue. really–everyone has to right to love whoever, whatever.

  5. Australian said:

    I’m so jealous. We here in Australia have elected a new progressive government, and our new prime minister refuses to allow any states to even have a civil union.


  6. Lyndsay said:

    “but being that we are a military couple (myself formerly), and the Guy is up for orders soon, if we want to stay together then we best get our behinds a State Approved Piece of Paper Kissed By Jeebuz himself. if he gets stationed overseas the only way to keep our family together is to marry.”

    I don’t know anything about the rules of the US military so I have to ask how could your family not stay together because of them? What could they do? Are you not allowed to live together without being married? If so, I just don’t get how they can have control over people’s personal lives. Shouldn’t work and personal life be separate?

    Saying it should be up to the states is a cop out to get as many votes as possible. It’s like the Republicans saying abortion laws should be left up to the states when really they think it should be illegal everywhere but lots of people wouldn’t be happy to hear plans about making it illegal across America.

  7. What could they do? Are you not allowed to live together without being married?

    we are allowed to live together, shit we’ve been doing it already, but since he is up for orders, and the choices of orders are pretty much overseas, if we want to go we have to be married. overseas means he will be living in military housing, and we can only live there w/ him if we are his dependents.

    it’s kind of complicated. and while personal and professional should be separate, the military is kind of forcing our hand on this one.

    i totally agree w/ you. like i said above, leaving something up to the states is a copout. that is basically why i abandoned Ron “i’m a racist, woman hating douchebag” Paul. he spouts about how he is anti choice and such, but that he would never federally mandate against it, “leave it up to the states to decide” on almost all of his issues. very clever here, b/c he doesn’t have scare everyone by saying he will make it illegal, but he also doesn’t have to take the responsibility of making sure that it is safe and legal for everyone.

  8. Lyndsay said:

    I heard you also have to keep your grass from growing too tall on military housing.

    Perhaps if there were more parties, each could be more honest about what they believe. Maybe. Right now the goal is simply to beat the one other and both parties seem to be trying to be less extreme than they actually could be to get the people who feel like they are in the middle and could vote for either.

  9. Just found this blog (via the fine folks at Feministe), thanks for the (queasiness-inducing) heads-up.

  10. […] Tip of the Hat/ Wag of the Finger Time for another round.  See the first here. […]

  11. […] Tip of the Hat/Wag of the Finger:  One, […]

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